ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
why is half of my head shaved?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
