even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
