:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
