I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Just cropdusted the office
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
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