sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I could make wine with my vomit
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
