I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
