he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
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the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
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As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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