so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
