Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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