Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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