I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
