Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
