when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.