idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
