Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.