do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
