My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
