Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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