are you still at the devil's house?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
