im gay
i know
yea but for you.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize