Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
