are you still at the devil's house?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
