we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
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Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
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Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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