Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Boobs are out for the taking
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Randomize
