Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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