She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize