Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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