what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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