She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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