im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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