The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
He did a backflip because drugs
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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