drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
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