I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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