Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
