The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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