I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
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I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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