I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
