it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
