Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(520): View more from Arizona

If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.

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(618): View more from Illinois

so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?

Fav 15 5137 1020
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(865): View more from Tennessee

And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays

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(205): View more from Alabama

just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.

Fav 26 1349 8073
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(214): View more from Texas

It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.

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(561): View more from Florida

His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.

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(845): View more from New York

Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.

Fav 3 1291 803
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug

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