I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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