Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
