I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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