Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Man, jail baloney is awful.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
