how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
