worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
