OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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