Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Randomize
