I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
