is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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