White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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